Thursday, March 8, 2012

Thursday Thirteen - Quotes about Parenting

I was up half the night with a screaming baby.  So, in light of this, I decided to post 13 amusing quotes about parenthood, because I'm exhausted and need a reminder that a sense of humor is the only way to get through the rougher moments of parenting. 

1. “A truly appreciative child will break, lose, spoil, or fondle to death any really successful gift within a matter of minutes.”

~ Russell Lynes

2. “The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.”
~ Lane Olinhouse

3. “When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.”
~ Erma Bombeck

4. “You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.”
~ Franklin P. Jones

5. “A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.”
~ Bill Vaughan

6. “The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common enemy.”
~ Author Unknown

7. “Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath, and hope we’ve set aside enough money to pay for our kids’ therapy.”
~ Michelle Pfeiffer

8. “The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet.”
~ Bill Cosby

9. “Mothers are all slightly insane.”
~ J.D. Salinger

10. “If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?”
~ Milton Berle

11. “Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare.”
~ Ed Asner

12.“Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.”
~ Peter Ustinov

13. “Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.”
~ Joyce Armor

Happy TT, people! 


  1. Great quotes! Hope you manage to get some rest tonight!

  2. I am not a parent, but these seem apt. Thanks for visiting my blog!

  3. #3 is my favorite. I loved Erma Bombeck!

  4. I love "part joy, part guerilla warfare!" Thanks for sharing.

  5. Good ones. Here's another: Having a child is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone

  6. Those are great!

    I just wanted to add to #2: The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to be talking on the phone

    The moment I pick up the phone, my kids are all over me and so loud that I just have to wait to talk to people after they go to bed.

  7. OMG!!! These are awesome. I totally need a playpen and I'm afraid I totally agree with Bill Cosby. LOL!

  8. I have one quibble with #2 - it doesn't just apply to parents. We aunties and uncles have the same method of gaining attention!


    Happy (belated) TT!