Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Oh, Those High School Dances! Blog Hop! Aka - A funky night!



This is hosted by the fabulous Kelley Lynn and Emily R. King.

Here are the rules for participation:
1. Post pictures of your high school dances. (Make sure you tell us which one is you if they're group pictures.)
2. Share with us your funniest high school dance story.
3. That's it!

Now, I don't know how funny this story is, but it sure is embarrassing, and I'd say worth the long read!

The day is March 15, 1996.  The theme:  Tropical Paradise.  It's senior prom, the day I've been looking forward to since I heard about my first prom when I was a little girl.  I had to skip the junior prom the year before because I was part of the Close Up program going to Washington D.C., and there was a dance there, a fabulous dance, but that's a story for a different time.

Anyway, this night was going to be special!  I had a good-looking college man taking me (my bf for two years) and I had spent weeks preparing.

The morning dawns bright and hot.  Really hot, even for Tucson in March.  I borrow Mom's Plymouth Acclaim, load up the girls and we all head to Dillards where we have hair and makeup appointments.

I tell the hairdresser I want a hair-style that looks a little like this:



Side-swept bangs, volume on the top, and my hair down in loose curls.  I was very fashion forward.

Well, the guy can't envision my vision and ends up giving me a hairstyle that falls flat and won't stay in place, and looks nothing like I want it to.  Plus, he spends two hours giving me a flat hair style, making me late for my nail appointment.  I had acrylics at the time.  I had to race to the nail salon, was 35 minutes late, and because I was late, Debbie, my nail gal, could only fix the one nail I had broken that week and give me a quick coat.  She wasn't happy with me.

Well, I had to pay the full amount...and the fingernail she just "fixed" snaps right off as I'm getting into the car.  It's too late to ask her to fix it again, so I'm resigned to having a broken acrylic for the night.  Le sigh.

Did I mention it's a very hot day?

Well, I get in the car, and drive back to the salon to pick up the girls and my hair is a limp, horrible looking mess.  The guy "insists" he fix it and I need decent hair for the prom, so he proceeds to give me ringlets...that make me look like a french poodle.


But don't worry, dear, it looks faaaaabbbbbuuuuuulous(!) he tells me.

Ahem.  So, I go home, and have to try to tame my hair into submission.  Mission accomplished, but man is it hot, my hair is done, and I'm late getting home (thanks to mister fabu) so I have to do a whore's bath with a wash cloth to try to clean up under the arms and such.  While waiting to dry, I get a phone call, get distracted, and forget to put on deodorant before I get my dress on.

Anyway, Carol, my bff, and KJ (<--ends up being prom king) show up and then Charles, my date shows up.  We do the pictures, we go to dinner, and we get to the dance.  After pictures and the like, we go dance...and dance, and dance, and dance.  And it is so hot!  And then I realize, wow, I'm a feeling a little less than fresh under the arms.  And then it hits me...I forgot the deodorant!

So, I spend the rest of the night dancing with my arms clenched to my side, absolutely mortified that I may be funky...and not the good, dancing kind of funky, but the toe-up, reeking funky.

Charles keeps asking me what's wrong, but I'm so obsessed with my possible malodorous state, and can't possibly tell him!  I ask Nicole, another one of my friends, if I smell about a million times, which she assures me I don't, but I don't believe her.  (It only occurred to me later that, with all the sweaty dancing going on, everyone smells a little funky.)

Anyway, after prom, we go to the hotel room where we're going to have a bitchin' time with our illegally gotten Boone's Farm Strawberry Fields and Screwdrivers (Oh, yeah, the good stuff...gag.) Charles and I have gotten our own room and Tanya and Todd have gotten theirs, and then they go off and it's just the two of us.  And up until that night, I've been wondering if I'm going to finally give up the V-card?  Oh, but it's not happening unless I shower.  So, I tell Charles I have to go shower, then I get into the bathroom, get undressed, and...discover I've started my period a week early and I have no female supplies.

It's almost two in the morning, nothing is open, and I couldn't possibly tell him I had gotten my period - almost as mortifying as the funky pits - so I do the wadded-up toilet paper thing, throw on my cute pj's, and just tell him I've decided I'm not in the mood.  He didn't push it at all, but he was confused since I seemed really into it for the last...oh, three months and before I went into the shower. 

Alas, I didn't lose my virginity until almost 7 months later to another guy.  Charles broke up with me two months later because...well, probably because he was tired of having a high school girlfriend, but when we met up at college the next year, he tried to get back together with me and I said he screwed up and shouldn't have let me go.  And I looked good the day I said it, I'm just sayin'.  Vindication!

Ahem...anyway, here's the lovely pic of me at prom:

Notice the arms down low?  Notice the poodle hair?  I did the best I could.  :D

It wasn't the prom night I always imagined.

67 comments:

  1. Haha! You looked great! What high school did you go to? I'm from Tucson and would have gone to Rincon but we moved. Looking good is always vindication :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. "I have to do a whore's bath with a wash cloth to try to clean up under the arms and such." I literally have tears in my eyes. The hubs asked me what's wrong with me, lol! Your story was too funny and all that stress sent your period early on you, poor thing. What a great tale. I loved it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sure, SURE, mock my pain! LOL. Glad you enjoyed my tale!

      Delete
  3. LOL! Your prom was ruined by bad hair and your after party was ruined by your feminine flow. HILARIOUS!

    And does anyone else think your dress kind of resembles dominatrix wear? Just sayin'... ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, it does have a bit of a dominatrix look to it, doesn't it? LOL.

      Delete
  4. OMG!!! This is funny! I'm sure not at the time but talk about a lot of issues in one night!

    This is how dances should be written or portrayed in movies :)

    And, for what it's worth. I think you look fabulous my dear :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. I wanna read see a movie with a prom like this, if only not to feel so alone. LOL.

      Thank you!

      Delete
  5. LOL, what a nightmare! I do love your photo though! :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. I wonder if anyone's ever gotten the hair they envisioned at the stylist ...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did for my wedding, so I know it's possible...just didn't happen at my prom, sadly. :(

      Delete
  7. I laughed out loud several times there. Definitely funny.

    ReplyDelete
  8. What a story! YOu still looked great. Hey, it was the 90's, anything went.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The sad thing is that it was all true. And thank you...wish I was that skinny again. :D

      Delete
  9. Crazy story! But I think you look way cute in your prom picture! So too bad for Charles!

    ReplyDelete
  10. You look pretty in your picture :) I can't believe how many things went wrong, how unlucky! We tried to have a ''prom'' in our school, but it's NEVER like it is in America, (/ on highschool style films!). I don't think I even have a funny story from mine. It was pretty uneventful!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, I'm sure it's exactly like it is in America. Despite what you've been lead to believe, our dances are never like they are in the movies. Ever. Usually they're boring, or lame, or full of drama. Lame. :D

      Delete
  11. That's crazy about everything that went wrong, but you look great!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Your story of keeping your arms to your sides is funny. I can totally imagine doing something like that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have you ever tried slow-dancing like that? Not fun. LOL.

      Delete
  13. Oh how sad. Probably a good thing you didn't sleep with the guy :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. LOL, love those ringlets. They look just like the you asked for ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know, it's like the hairdresser read my mind...cough... ;D

      Delete
  15. I LOVE the poodle hair! You wear it well :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Ha! Funny now, but yes, I imagine mortifying to our teenage selves! Great pic!

    ReplyDelete
  17. LMAO!!!! Oh my gosh! This is a good one! Yes, totally fabulous story. You poor thing! Totally not the way the night was supposed to go. You still looked gorgeous though!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww, thank you.

      I've since learned not to get my hopes up about anything...that way my expectations can always be met. :D

      Delete
  18. Oh man no deodorant is killer. But at least you still had fun. And you do not look like a poodle.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, thank you. I still, to this day, though, keep extra deodorant at work just in case I forget to put it on in the mornings. Lesson was learned.

      Delete
  19. Your hair in no way resembles the poodle. You looked great and that's a fun story. (Fun to look back at now...then...not so much.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, sadly, it did until I went home and pulled it up on the sides to tame some of the awful curliness. I looked like I had fluffy poodle ears! So not good.

      Thanks! :D

      Delete
  20. Oh I ripped the underarms of my dress at one of the dances I went to and did the arm clenching thing too! I feel for you girl. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you have to slow dance that way? That was a real interesting one to try. :D

      Delete
  21. Boone's Farm! Ugh...flashbacks.

    Also, as a rule, I'm not allowed to comment on the...thing that prevented the prom night activities. Nor am I allowed to comment on hair or clothes. That's the rule.

    Not poodle hair, though. That much I can say.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL, I wondered if you or Alex would even be able to bring yourself to comment today after I wrote this...so thanks for reading and taking the time to comment, despite the content that you can't comment on. :D

      And yes, Boone's Farm is quite possibly the nastiest stuff on earth...almost as bad as Natty Light or 40oz of Mickeys. :Shudders:

      Delete
    2. Oh Natty Light. Oh...I just threw up a little.

      Delete
    3. Natty Light...the choice of broke-ass college students everywhere. We used to get a keg for $13.98 and I get a headache just thinking about the horrible hangovers I'd get from it. Blech!

      Delete
  22. Arm clenching!! Hahaha awesome! Minus the poodle hair, you look fabulous. The guy gets 2 points for not pushing, but loses about a zillion for the break up. Shame on him!!

    ReplyDelete
  23. awww! dont be so hard on yourself! you looked beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh so funny! Boones, that must be the drink of choice for high schoolers--double yuck! And you don't look like a french poodle at all, totally gorgeous! But do I detect a scrunchie in your hair? hehehe I had a banana clip in my Freshman year Homecoming pic :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the thing, it's not a scrunchie. The hairstyle the hairdresser gave me had these sides that looked like poodle ears, so I went home and pulled my hair up into a top knot, then added some silk flowers my sister had left over from homecoming around the rubber band.

      Delete
    2. Oh, and thank you (where are my manners?) LOL.

      Delete
  25. Oh, so sorry! Don't you hate it when the hair dresser thinks they know better?

    ReplyDelete
  26. A whore's bath HA! It was probably horrible the day of but now you can look back at it and laugh. I did the forget the deodorant thing once and I knew I didn't smell but I was so self conscious about it I had to run to the store and buy some.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, I had pasta for dinner and I was convinced I was sweating garlic! LOL.

      Delete
  27. You're right! It was well worth the read!

    I forgot deodorant before a jr high dance...I understand the pain of clenched pits!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nice to know. ;)

      I'm glad you enjoyed it!

      Delete
  28. What a story! I hate when I forget deodorant. I've stashed travel size in my office, just in case. I agree with the others, you look gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww, thank you! I keep a travel size at school, and I've been known to carry one in my purse on especially hot days when I know I'll be out of the house for a while. I was traumatized and learned my lesson well. :D

      Delete
  29. What a tragic tale of woe! But so well written :) Thanks for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
  30. You are a brave, brave woman for sharing that one, Jaycee. I love it! :D

    P.S. Are you kidding me? That's a gorgeous photo! None of this poodle nonsense. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL, they said they wanted funny stories and I had one that was funny and true...I decided to go for it. LOL.

      And thank you. That's very sweet of you to say. :D

      Delete
  31. Oh, that's funny about your hair experience. I think your hair looked lovely!! And Boone's, yeah I recall Boone's. We were very good friends my first year of college.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you!

      Yeah, Boone's and I were friends...until I was able to afford decent stuff and then forgetaboutit! I realized how nasty that junk was. LOL.

      Delete
  32. I'm not sure what you're talking about - I think you look adorable! :) I'm so sorry about the deodorant, though! I hate it when I feel self-conscious like that. :(

    I'm sorry I'm so late getting around the bloghop. I'm in the midst of my brother's pre-wedding week, so life's a bit crazy.

    ReplyDelete